100th Post

Yay, this is my 100th entry on this blog! I thought I had to make it special and so I was thinking what I could write about. Nothing seemed special enough, although there were lots of things.

Renai had another live, this time near Mannheim, which is really far away from Berlin and we had to stay for the whole weekend.
Our live was quite good... why only quite? Because the monitoring was immensly loud, that none of us could hear herself singing ... meaning we were too loud or too silent or not on tone or or or ... it was really confusing. -_- We also made a lot of dancing mistaktes ... somehow the whole performance was just too weird!! Can you imagine?!

But for the evening we went to a ballroom dance. It was kinda interesting and I was really looking forward to it, because it was the first time for me. Everyone looked awesome! Let me show you some pictures! :D I must excuse, because the quality kinda sucks ... the lobby was dark and we had to use flash...

Yumi, looking stunning! She made the skirt herself.

The unhappy couple. XD I actually forced them to pose like this, but they reminded me of a prom couple!

Giny! Looking murderous as always. XD

 Daisy with another great dres!! Aww, I really want a dress like that!!!

Laureen in a cute, frilly dress.

Mina with my huge, blonde wig.^^

And me with her wig! We had a situation and didn't know what to do with our hair, so in the end, we just switched.^^




Aaaaaand today... is actually my birthday! I'm getting older and older. X.X
Yesterday was my stageplay ander after that, my friends were with my and the whole ensemble waited for me to turn older. Everybody sang for me and it was really a nice turn. I still wish, it never happened. T_T

And today I celebrated with my family. My parents, grandparents and me, we all went for lunch and we had cake aaaand I got presents... maybe I should show you some pics tomorrow.

At night they fly, you better run

So, tomorrow is New Year's eve and I wish all of you the best!
Truth is ... I'm f*cking exhausted! It's like after my two weeks of vacation, I'm even more tired than before.
Every night I'm sleeping like a dead one, but when I wake up I don't feel a bit rested ... maybe I'm a little ill or something ... or maybe I'm sleep walking, wouldn't be the first time.
I'm also hallucinating from time to time at night ... never happens when I'm fully awake, only in the middle of the night, when I'm in the place between awakening and sleeping, then I see things...
I guess my subconsciousness is trying to talk to me and it seems to be important. What is it, that's on my mind, so perfectly oppressed, it can only come to me at night?
Weird. Really weird.

End of the year

Oh well, Christmas is over and I'm really pumped out...

Also, my holidays aren't very relaxing. I might have had one week more of free days, but every day is filled with book reports, reviews, discussion papers or oral presentation. It's like school's mocking me: "You have more free days to work at home!"

And worse: First schoolday in the new year will be January, 2nd ... every prof canceled its lesson ... except for the first one, which is at 8am! I'm so pissed. -_-

But before that, there are a few days left, that I can use to ... uh ... learn... I hate my life.

New Year's Eve is near, too. Somehow, this year I didn't make any plans at all and let it just coming. Really a lot of people asked me, if I wanted to join them and I was always like: "Ah, well, I'll think about it", because I had my mind somewhere else in the clouds.

Now I kinda missed the train, damn it! oO

Let's see, what I'm going to do about it...

Oh and by the way, check this out! The best Christmas Carol (although Christmas is over ... ah, what the heck) in the world:

Renai Birthday and University fears

As I've told you before, on Thursday was my group's birthday and yesterday we all went to celebrate.
Well ... sadly not all, two couldn't make it.

Gena, Laureen and I went together, because we've spend the afternoon with sewing ... or rather Gena, who actually knows what she's doing, tried to beat some skills into us ... sorry for being bothersome!

Like last year, we went to Ishin restaurant, because it's good and not too expensive!
Haaa... and it was GOOD!

All in all, we were Gena, Giny, Nikki, Mina, Laureen and I. Nice group of 6 people.


But a bigger problem is on its way. Tomorrow I'm enrolling in university and I'm really scared!!
Not if people will be nice and such.

I'm continuously asking myself: "Was it the right decision?" "Should I've chosen an apprenticeship?" "Am I studying the right subjects?" "Can I handle the work?" "Can I make it in 3 years?" "Do I actually know how to learn after over 3 years?" "Will I be successfull?" "Am I ruining my damn life?!"

I am so scared ... I've had so much time and still I can't believe, it's already tomorrow. Time really flies in the blink of an eye.

I hope, I can finally be happy...

Happy Birthday Renai Revolution!

Today is a very happy day for me, because on this very day two years ago, my group Renai Revolution came to life!

Over the years, we had some troubles (big time!), but everything turned out to be fine.

We really had to work for what we've achieved and I guess, that's something good, because we'll never forget what we've been through and that we should be humble.

So yatta~~~ to another great year.

Haha, I know I went a little over the top with the cake and the candles, but I am SO HAPPY, we made it this far ... wasn't always so sure, we'd actually reach the first anniversary...

Well, I'm happy.

And my mum actually wrote the card for me and my dad called me this morning to send wishes. It's a little weird, but I think they're happy, too, since they've seen all my suffering sometimes.

Thank you!!